“I no longer believed in the idea of soul mates, or love at first sight. But I was beginning to believe that a very few time in your life if you were lucky, you might meet someone who was exactly right for you. Not because he was perfect, or because you were, but because your combined flaws were arranged in a way that allowed two separate beings to hinge together”……Lisa Kleypas.
Flawless skin, tall height with proportionate weight mesmerized all. We human being forever attracted towards good things whether it relates to a person, object or our fantasy. We all love to see those things initially which soothes our eyes first then comes to rest all aspects. So looks matters a lot in that aspect. We not even spare bad looking any object in our life so what, when we have the option to replace that, then how could we have taken for the grant when it comes to choosing any living being in our life? Yes, RELATIONSHIP the utmost significant aspect of our life where we stuck when its come to the question of its selection.
What are we looking for?………..
Looks are your main “market value” when it comes to relationships. Women’s main market value in relationships are their looks, men’s value is based on their social status.
You need to have similar “value” to make a transaction. It’s not superficial it’s hard-wired in our subconsciousness.
Men value a woman at around 80% looks. A woman only uses a man’s looks for 20% of his overall attractiveness. Men screen for looks more so that they hold their partner’s hands gladly in front of their associates. Women are attracted to high status, provider, protector males which they judge on their behavior.
Almost every woman is looking for 3 main components in a man. First, success or at least a goal in life that they are driven by. Second, security, loyalty, and trust as a package and third, the commitment of their partner.
Loving a person can have so many reasons he/she should be fair, tall and all exterior quality but his personality should be charming.
Is looks matters for libido?………..
If you aren’t physically attracted to someone then it will be difficult to cultivate a sexual relationship. To men, looks do matter. They like a pretty face and a fine body. Women, on the other hand, can be attracted to a man if he’s decent-looking, as long as he has money to make up for it. Therefore, if either person has sexual desires then it will be difficult to have a relationship with sexual intimacy. If neither person is very interested in sex then it is most likely not an issue. However, if the parties involved are interested in sex then physical attraction is required. Looks are important because this is the basis for sexual attraction.
We all grow older and show signs of aging, but as long as we do it with style, and try to take as best care of ourselves as we can, beauty never really fades as long as we remain engaged, communicative, compassionate, and kind. The most attractive person eventually becomes ugly if they have an unflattering personality if they’re neglectful, abusive, boring, or dim.
What is the basic need of relationship?………
Although looks are important for initial attraction, long-term bonds are built on………..
- Similarity…. should have same interests and values for each other.
- Loyalty … both must be loyal about their past and present.
- Contiguity …. attribute the closeness between each other.
- Artlessness … honesty about talking stuff that matters.
- Involvement …… emotional investment in the relationship.
- Polarity …. dominant vs submissive pole.
- Commitment … pledged with your said wordings.
Again humans probably weren’t designed to be solely monogamous, that’s a failure social construct as we’re seeing among many couples these days.
No love is not blind in the matter of looks!………
The first step towards love is the attraction that you feel towards someone and that’s where looks become important to you. Looks are not everything but it matters a lot. People will say that “Love is blind” and all that crap but in fact, practically nobody falls in love blindly, though there are exceptions but majority wise you will find out looks are given the first preference.
The time where your looks play its part is when someone gets attracted towards you for the first time. Means, you don’t love anyone only because of their looks but love starts with attraction.
Looks matter until you’re in love. There are many couples who are madly in love yet clearly are not on par with one another in the looks department. Looks matter most in the initial courtship. Looks play a strong role in the initial courtship especially if you’re competing with others who are far better looking. It’s not like that only a good looking person attracts the opposite gender but yes if you have good looks with your other qualities then it’s icing on the cake. It’s very evident that people with good looks attract the opposite gender more easily.
When you least bother about looks?……….
People talk about “Love at first sight“. That’s actually not loving, but that’s an attraction only that you feel for the opposite gender. Once love crept in, then there’s no need for looks or something.
In true love importance of looks doesn’t matter. Maybe sometimes u fall for someone because of his/her looks but when u starts a relationship and real love develops then your partner’s look will not be an important issue for you. If you have an average look then there’s nothing more needed other than how good you are as a person to mesmerize anyone.
I’m not asking you to sympathize with women and lookism, more just meaning that it’s part of human nature to want to move towards that which is pleasing to you. No matter what a woman looks like, if she’s confident, she’s voluptuous. There are plenty of people out there who truly do not want to be with a great looking woman. They find it intimidating.
Any woman who presents well holds herself straight up, no slouching, no fear of being heard, she will be attractive. It acts similarly to me. Looks help a lot, but they are not everything. Suppose every woman wanting to sleep with you, but none of them want to stay, now that’s a disadvantage. An entire life of lust without love.
Average looking guys have absolutely nothing to worry about. If you’re not downright hideous and you play your cards right, you have a very good chance of winning over the girl and having a long-lasting relation.
How relationships stay for long-term?……..
Practice self-awareness, forgive, be a good teammate, grow together, adapt views, cultivate your finer qualities, compliment and praise each other, develop your own interests, don’t keep score, encourage and pamper each other, offer solutions not criticism, respect space and time, don’t be hesitant to speak your mind, be romantic, admit that you are wrong, respect his or her friends, be affectionate, mind your manners, remember to say “thank you and sorry.”
Everyone wants to feel desirable, especially by their partner. If you don’t actually desire your partner that’s just bad all around. It’s not just important for the early stages, it’s also important down the line too when you’re both old. You’re going to want to look back and enjoy all those memories of being young and dumb and beautiful.
Make an unconditional love with long-term………
Love is a big term. People generally don’t realize that a mere upburst of hormonal activities inside them isn’t loving. Love is something that is totally unconditional. It’s beyond pain and pleasure.
For instance, you meet an accident which has disfigured your face then will you stop loving him/her because he/she doesn’t look as gorgeous as he/she was before?
If your answer is yes, then definitely you don’t love him/her at all. But if it doesn’t make any difference to you the way he/she looks, then there’s true love between you both. So, instead of thinking about looks, try to improve yourself as a good person.
Moreover, if you are very caring and soft-spoken one without having any ego or attitude in your personality then even a rude uncivilized person also get attracted towards your personality, whereas we are living in a civilized society where at least we possess the minimum etiquette to reply with humble to anyone whoever is caring bad looks or status.
So next time you see a good-looking man and think that he holds all of the cards, think again. He may be receiving all of the looks and smiles. But the truth is, you’ve actually got more chance than he has with that beauty at the bar. Love means to give your soul to your partner, not just your heart.
Looks matter, but it’s not the condition for love, fortunately, other things matter more. Good looks matters, you mean good personality and well dress up. Grooming yourself. Felling beautiful inside-out.
Not specific about a relationship but don’t you want to look handsome/beautiful and also you don’t want to be with the person who is handsome/beautiful from inside-out. “Love means to give your soul to your partner, not just your heart and physical body.”
“I mean, if the relationship can’t survive the long term, why on earth would it be worth my time and energy for the short term?”…… Nicholas Sparks.