How to change the mindset from negative to positive?

Introduction….

Mr. Nair who worked in a steel factory, worked very hard to brought up his 3 children. His major concern was to settle his daughter’s marriage as long as he has his job. To accumulate a big amount for marriage was not so easy for him but still, he did that with his best.Urvi the elder daughter of Mr. Nair and Unsa the mid daughter and Manksh younger son. Mrs.Nair a homemaker. Manksh studying at 12th standard, Unsa just completed her Graduation and now taking tuition of her locality’s children.

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Urvi the elder among 3 siblings is best in her studies and she just completed her P.hd. Now she is planning to join at college as a professor. She always looks very simple not even likes to do makeup when goes out for any family function also.

Her mother always used to say  her“ Urvi do some makeup dear.. you would seem  pretty like your younger sister…’’ but she always replied her mother that she doesn’t require any artificial look, her natural look is quite enough for her and moreover she isn’t so bad in her looks then why she needs for all those makeup?Urvi since childhood wears simple dress means whatever her parents gives her she goes fine with those not even now she ever select a handkerchief or shoe for herself. Her everything has been selected by her parents.

And their Unsa just the reversed one always she likes to see herself good whether she in-house or at outside. Unsa never likes to live as simple as like her elder sister Urvi. She always bought dresses and other accessories as per her own taste. She not even allowed anyone’s interference in all those things.

Manksh also doing good in the study but he was best in athletics, in fact, he was a District champion in wrestling. Now he would be preparing himself for State level after completed his 12th board exams. Mr. Nair and his family have a big hope on his son’s achievement.

Manksh who got selected for wrestling at State level had been excited about his preparation in the year of 2015. He couldn’t able now to attend his regular vital classes of school but from Principle to Teachers all were supportively cheered up for his goal. As it’s a great honored for their school name that one of their students would be going to play at State level.

Sudden mishap……….

All of a sudden, he succumbed after that mishap. Manksh’s fitness regime of every day begins at 4 am. He left the house for that 3:45 am and returned at 6:30 am. Like other days while returning to the home on his way he met an accident in the year of 2015, 27 Jan. During his powerwalking, while crossing the highway he just trampled by a full loaded heavy truck……..The traumatic incident iced the Nair family. How parents take that utmost traumatized crucial phase of life when their athletic young son lost his life?

In general, we get to see that in such cases a mother takes a lot of time for coming out from that crucial phase of life and a father who always stands as a strong pillar help his wife to make her normal against the situation.

When responsibilities not allowing for mourning…

But here Mrs. Nair as a mother quite strong than a father.  Mr. Nair who almost lost his all hope from life became a mourner who had been surviving for his 2 daughters. He now restrained himself from rest all things of life, his only motto was now to settled his 2 daughters life by giving them marriage as soon as possible.Moreover, Mr. Nair had been carried a strange fear, regarding his life span that if he dies tomorrow without finishing his utmost responsibility towards his daughters then what he will answer his Almighty.

He now started for searching groom for his 2 daughters as he wanted to give their marriage as soon as before he takes retirement. Because he wants to see his both daughters settlement at a time. At any cost, he doesn’t want to delayed for that. At last, he searched out his choice able groom for his 2 daughters.

He selected Jeet, a rich business profile groom for Unsa so that her persistence of lavishness would remain for forever.For Urvi he selected Abhi, a highly educated CA well-established groom so that her daughter’s high education degree would be honored.

Here both the sisters doesn’t want to marry so early so they told their mother to postpone their marriage but she said that their father wants to finish his responsibility prior his retirement. So she couldn’t help out them from that.

Mrs. Nair asked him many times that why he settled their 2-daughter’s marriage so hurriedly and at the same day as both their daughters were not ready to get married so early. Because both wanted to settle in their career before they would tie. Moreover also a year not passed too when the family had lost their only son. Then he told that he had the phobia of uncertain death. So before any mishap again knocks at the door, he wanted to secure their daughter’s life.

Finally, their marriage finalized on 22nd Mar 2016. In this way, both Urvi and Unsa got married on the same day. For Mr. Nair today, he completed his major responsibility towards his daughters, but for Mrs. Nair as a mother it’s really painful that her 2 daughters left the house at same day but anyhow she also knew that whatever her husband did was better for their future and as a wife she had been very obedient towards his husband always.

 Responsibilities over….

Post marriage of 2 daughters, that night Mr. Nair seems quite relaxed and excited he told his wife that as a father today he did his biggest duty and now if death also comes to take him away then also he doesn’t have any objection towards that.

After heard that utter of death Mrs. Nair just reacted on him for his such negative perspective towards life, by seeing his wife’s such loving attachment towards him, he made her understood by consoling her in his hug that it’s only his fear and it’s not necessary that fear would always come to true. Manksh’s sudden accidental death created an intense phobia within him.

Urvi with Abhi and Unsa with Jeet was quite happy in their initial days. Unsa with her husband stayed at their in-laws home. Here company transferred Abhi to another state so Urvi and Abhi now stayed there.

By seeing both the daughter’s happiness, Mr.Nair now bit secured about them. one day suddenly he hands over his wealth and property  legal documents to his wife and told her that if any unpredictable incident would happen then she would be get readied to face that.

When fear comes true………….

After 2 months of their daughter’s marriage suddenly one day he got attacked by a major heart attack, not even he gave minimum time to his wife to hospitalized him, in fact when they reached the hospital, Dr. already declared his death.

For Mrs. Nair now it’s really a big issue to handle the situation means she now thought that how she would be going to informed her 2 daughters. As time had given a new happy life to them after passed a traumatic phase in 2015. Then how she would again use that horrific utter of uncertain death about their father after Manksh?

Finally, she called them by hiding the utter of death. She told over the phone that their father got an attack and now he has being stabilized by treatment but admitted at ICU………

For Urvi and Abhi it took the time to reached their as they came by flight from another state, but Unsa with Jeet reached at the hospital within an hour. Now the truth revealed after landing at the hospital. Both Urvi and Unsa now became speechless after seeing their father’s unpredictable death.

After finishing all formalities and rituals now Mrs.Nair completely got alone in that house. 2 deaths in a family and that’s also one after another year, first her younger son now her husband. She now had adequate time for her mourn, none of her closed ones had that daring to withheld her mourn.

Mrs. Nair now told their daughters and son-in-law that their father Mr.Nair had been carried a phobia of untimely death after he underwent the trauma of their son’s sudden death. Even he also shared his all legal documents about properties with her, that much insecurity he had been carried since a year. Maybe Manksh’s death taught him a tight lesson about life and death for which he affirmed about his own untimely death.

 What made them so different?

After all those now Urvi and Unsa decided that they would be in alternative mode come to their mother’s house at every weekend to stay at least a day or two along with her. In this way, days are passing by.

Unsa who since her childhood always loves to do makeup now completely changed her looks. Now she hardly touches her makeup kit, not even she dressed up like earlier she used to. Looks very simple in her cotton saree.

And their Urvi who since her childhood loves to live simple in her wearing and lifestyle now completely make over herself by using cosmetics with brand dresses.

Urvi’s husband Abhi who was a CA by profession suddenly left his job one day without any valid cause. When Urvi asked, he told her that he felt monotonous to his work regime so now he didn’t want to go office anymore. His such strange reply not only amazed Urvi but also forced her to know him thoroughly.

Now for Urvi, the question arose then what he would do further means if he didn’t like that company then would he like to do work from home or either he wants to do self-business because as a CA he has lots of opportunities to explore his ideas in finance field to make money. But her all queries got answered when she found that Abhi was a very fickle minded person for whom interest never stayed for long in anything whether its relates to any person, work or anything else.

Abhi now whole day while sitting at home sometimes with his laptop to chat with his friends just wasted his days. Neither he had that interest to do anything nor understanding about the depth of his profile and also he doesn’t bother about Urvi’s emotions. Slowly he turned into a lethargic person.

So many times Urvi pointed him about his such carefree attitude towards life, but he doesn’t care her any wordings at all, not even he ready to understand that he had already been married so as a married guy he had certain responsibilities towards his wife and family but nothing worked out.

Now Urvi had an intense fear about the sustainability of her marital relationship with his husband. Abhi as a fickle and desperate personnel if any day lost his interest upon his wife Urvi then what would be going to happen? This one thought now slowly changed her lifestyle. She had a fear that if Abhi would felt bore at her casual simple look. At anyhow she wants to secure her marital life, she started to make over her in an elegant look. Every day now she makes up with a different way too mesmerized Abhi.

Their Unsa who loves to see herself in the mirror often now hardly got time even to comb her hairs. Jeet after their marriage revealed his health report in front of Unsa. He was an unhealthy guy whose sickish attitude now made Unsa worried about his lifespan. He all-time needs a proper medical observation for his well-being. Actually, he had been detected by leukemia. She always queasy about jeet’s health, which made her changed the way of living. Now she hardly turned to mirror because she had an intense fear about his husband’s lifespan.

Mother’s one word changed their perception……

Mrs. Nair, as a robust woman with full of positivity, after knowing all those about truth about her 2 daughters marital life now she told  only one thing that ‘’be bold and brave enough so that if  any negative result will be waiting at the doorstep to knock the door of your marital life  then you  should must have that strength to face that with your courageous  and positive attitude, then you will find that negative turned to a positive one.’’

She told her daughters that they both were exactly behaving like their father who never tried to heal his wound, in fact, he tried to give up to the situation. He died untimely because he had the phobia of death. For Urvi she too has the phobia about her marriage sustainability and their Unsa has also the phobia of losing her husband’s life.

’Courage is the most important of all virtues because, without courage, you can’t practice any other virtue consistently…. Maya Angelou’’

As per her perception if their father doesn’t show so hurried regarding their marriage then he might get that sufficient time to scrutinized about groom’s physical health and their typical habits.

Secondary In the case of Urvi, after taking such highest degree, he not even bothered to explore his daughter’s career unless today she might be in some better position in her profession field.

And finally, Mr.Nair was responsible for his own sudden death because he had been going under stressed throughout the life. Earlier, he carried the stress about his job tenure means he wanted to finish his major responsibilities before he retired from his job. After son’ death, one more stress added in his life about his lifespan.

 ‘’A fearful mind could never take any right decision.’’

After seeing that highest level of mental strength within their mother in her 65 years of age who already lost her young son a year ago, and just few days ago, again who lost her ultimate support of life, just made Urvi and Unsa quite strengthened at new way of perspective towards their life to face those phases of life.

Now Urvi had been focused on her motivating utter rather than she make up to get back her husband in right track. She joined to a college as a professor. Abhi by seeing that his wife was going out for work he felt ashamed and realized his fault. Their Unsa also left her negative view towards the lifespan of her husband and concentrated on his better medical treatment.

After 6 months the result came out with its positive form. Yes… it’s not any miracle but the reinforce of positivity. Only one positive thought of their mother changed their life.

Jeet now quite better than earlier, his physic now responding good to the treatment and as per Dr., he would be recovered very soon hopefully in the next coming 3 months. Unsa and Jeet now quite happy by hoping for their new healthy marital life.

Their Abhi again joined to his new job now he became serious about his career and his family too. Though it took time but it’s never too late to begin the journey.

‘’It’s never too late – never too late to start over, never too late to be happy …. Jane Fonda.’’

 

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