How to get over a breakup?

“Love all, trust a few, do wrong to none …… William Shakespeare.” 

Clarin 25 years old gorgeous working in an MNC, like other parents her parents also have lots of dreams and plans for her marriage. But Clarin doesn’t have any interest in guys and marriage which is the biggest cause of strain for her parents. For others, Clarin’s attitudes are quite abnormal towards guys. She not even ready to talk or take the favor from any guys also nor ready to accept friendship even in Facebook.

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 First experience of love and break up……….

Like others, clarin has the past about which she never disclosed with none in her surroundings. Her first love Sam, with whom she explored the essence of love. First love always left an imprint on mind canvas for forever. Clarin still remembers those golden days of her life.

A girl never forget those days of her life when first time someone makes that normal day into a very special day by making her realize that….. how beautiful she is! What importance she has in his life? What qualities she possess which attracts him towards her? How different she is from rest all? What forced him to think only about her?

Yes……….these are all those significant things which first time she gets to heard by someone that makes her feel that she is really very special in someone’s eyes.

The first lip kiss and embrace cultivates her arousal when she began to imagine her man while rolling on the bed. Now with the variant pose at each angle, she views herself in mirror randomly and tries to identify that exact angle of her face which mesmerized her partner. Sam’s pampering made her the most beautiful girl in her college. Days never seemed so beautiful earlier in her life. Her taste and choice now overwhelmed by her beloved’s taste.

Later 7 months suddenly Sam switched off from Clarin’s life exactly at that phase when Clarin’s each thought and desire was completely dependent on him where she couldn’t imagine her life beyond him for a second also. But surely he narrated her the cause of his sudden u-turn that “Clarin you are not my type so better we give pause for our relationship…”

Yes…. she is not at all Sam’s type because Sam wants to physically intimate with her to take the charm of their lovemaking at the hotel room where Clarin’s ethics not allowed her before marriage because she had a fear that if after sexual intimacy Sam left her and not shown his interest in marriage. Her fear came true but not after by surrendering her physic surely before that. She locked her shattered life in the darkness of the room. Time paused for her, her parents noticed her gloomy attitude, no words she had to explain others but carrying huge pain inside.

Have you ever tried to explore yourself? ………

Ask this one single question before someone spits it on your face that does you know your real worth? If you see yourself liking a wrong man, you must ask your mind and heart that, “Why? Who are you? What is wrong with me? Am I an ugly girl? In similar terms, you must have answers to the cited questions. “I’ve never fooled anyone. I’ve let people fool themselves. They didn’t bother to find out who and what I was. Instead, they would invent a character for me. I wouldn’t argue with them. They were obviously loving somebody I wasn’t …….. Marilyn Monroe.” 

 Self-counseling is needed to change your perspective, “Are you an option for other people? No offense, but never ever give priority to someone for whom you are just an option. Forever remember that the act of inclining towards someone make them aware about your addiction for them, they will make sure that at every moment you suffer from an acute pain of their addiction. Many women affirmed that even after their one hundred percent efforts they failed to give up an addiction, ‘just not happening’ like situation.

Our intense habits couldn’t wave off within a day or year because changing habits isn’t an ease thing to do, but for our betterment, we should have to adopt these. Therefore, one should behave at the size of her brain and not at the size of her shoe. As we all aware that nothing is impossible it’s just our one thought which could really change our life even after the break up of long term relationship.  

Let’s give another chance …………

There are positive and negative waves around us, which respond as per our attitude towards them. Therefore, don’t let the negative waves come near you and always keep the options open.

Later a few years now she joined in an MNC just after completion of her education. Rik, her Boss almost 12 years senior to her proposed her. Needless to explain how she rebuffed his proposal. “Sorry, I can accept your proposal. No offense, but I hate men.”

 There is nothing odd in falling for a wrong person, but the issue arises whenever we failed to recollect ourself after a serious breakup and our suspicious attitude grow for all man.

Rik’s gray hair of matured thinking towards life impressed Clarin and finally, she accepted his proposal with this hope that she had finally got someone who would never go against her affection. Clarin portrayed Rik about the cause of her noninterest towards love that how her first love Sam ditched her in the mid path of their relationship by trampling his all commitment towards Clarin.

Later 6 months of their relationship now Clarin was ready to surrender herself to Rik because this time she doesn’t want to repeat her mistake by disallowing her lover to come physically close to her. So finally they physically intimated.

 But is it really the way, to be physically intimate to make our relationship stronger before we tie up? if yes then why Clarin failed to keep her relationship?

Yes…. after a year she met her second break-up with Rik, but the question is why she had been faced the same? Rik as a senior aged guy who very easily read Clarin’s mind thoroughly, when she narrated him about the cause of her first breakup with Sam. Rik knew that today or tomorrow Clarin will surely agree for physical intimacy with him because this time she wouldn’t take the risk of again lose her lover. But Rik roughly used her emotions because it’s his ploy towards Clarin by showing sympathy for her past and take her in his grip strongly.

Is really solace need to heal our pain?…………

We human being always craved for praise and sympathy and that’s why often bad people plays with our emotions by hiding their original intention towards their fake sympathy. Learn to take self-decisions independently. Always remember, gray hair does not define a person’s maturity level, capabilities of taking decisions for self-does. Therefore, do not let others decide for you, have your own decisions, at last, if something goes wrong you know it is only you responsible for that and it is only you who can rectify it.

Never wait for other’s solace instead stand up straight by holding your two hands strongly and say it loudly that none has the power to break me emotionally as I’m the most beautiful and strongest soul on the earth.

“Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift of God, which is why we call it the present ……..Bil Keane.”

 

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